This month, Ricci speaks from the heart:
A little about me: I'm a creative, a singer, a writer, a secret poet. I have endless hope for the world, and find myself disappointed in humanity frequently. I am a wife and a mother to many. I met my wife in high school. I have 3 children: my son is a marine, my 2nd is a sophomore at Ovid-Elsie, and my youngest just turned 1. She is completely disabled and requires round the clock significant care. We are a foster home and have been able to foster many children over the years, and additionally hosted an exchange student, all of whom I love and will forever consider them my children. I work in state government as a supervisor, I am President of Michigan Pride, and I serve on the board of directors for MiDec. I’ve recently started a nonprofit dedicated to my chronically ill child in hopes to bring awareness to children who suffer and deserve better lives. I am also an ordained minister and do my share of wedding ceremonies, in addition to I singing at funerals.
That’s enough about me, let’s get to the questions. What makes me, me? I’ll be honest in saying my life hasn’t always been easy or pretty. I’ve gone through a lot to shape who I am. I was a young single mom who didn’t really know what I was doing, but I did it with love and I didn’t give up. My children have always been my pushing force. I’m 40 now, and more of my life has been spent as being a parent, than anything else. And while being a parent doesn’t make up all that I am, it certainly has played a huge role in the making of me. I didn’t come out til I was in my 20s; I’d known since I was a young child. But even in the late 90s it still wasn’t widely accepted and I felt I had to hide that part of myself and make others happy. It wasn’t til I’d come out, lived my truth, and then some years later that I got more comfortable in my own skin as a queer woman. And it wasn’t until much later that I began to use my voice to stand up and talk about the things that matter.
As for my role in the St. Johns community, I think I am still figuring that out. I’ve been here for over a decade, and I’ve decided that I don’t necessarily have to fit in - I want what’s best for the community, it’s youth and the people. I’ll show up in the ways I know how to. By fostering and by supporting the efforts that are important and that impact those who are marginalized. What I love about St. Johns is how there is a common ground about helping people in the community, and about highlighting our local small businesses. There is a lot of pride around that. We could always work on communicating to one another better, kinder, softer. One thing I would like to see is more involvement with our youth that are more at risk, in the schools and outside. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of support for these kids, speaking from my own experiences. There also is a bullying issue in the schools that is not addressed well by the educators and/or parents. Words of wisdom - some words I live by is will this moment matter in 5 days? 5 months or 5 years? Typically the answer is no, and I can stop stressing about it and move on. One statistic that sticks with me is that we have 750,000 children in foster care, and 30.4% of them identify as LGBTQ+. Foster kids are already at risk as they move through the system, adding that they are LGBTQ+ puts them at even more risk to age out of the system without permanency, suicide, incarceration, harassment, homelessness. It’s a staggering amount of kids, and I wish that more people would step up and advocate for them.
In social justice, equity and inclusion, we have come a long way, but we still have a long way to go. Not until people feel and are safe to live, work and be honored exactly as they are have we reached true inclusion. We need to start teaching our children the parts of history that shaped where we are today, teach about our differences, and continue as adults to listen to people with different life experiences. We have to touch each other’s hearts through storytelling, and never stop reading and learning.
As far as goals go, right now I am living a day at a time. Having a sick child teaches you all about patience and moments. I am taking time to stop looking so far ahead, because I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I will keep doing what I can, where I can, as much as I can, and I’ll do it with love.
